Forecast: Rain and Flying Pigs!

Anyone who meets me for the first time will probably find out three things about me within the first ten minutes of conversation: my father is a pastor, I have a grand *cough! obsessive* passion for Vin Diesel and I abhor spiders. I'm very, very proud of my father and value his wisdom and guidance. That's not going to change. My love for Vin has endured for ten years...Hey, if I still adored him after Babylon, A.D., I'm gonna always be down for him! And my hatred and fear of spiders? Well, that's been around for the last three decades and still holding strong! Not. Gonna. Change.

So when I come across something that makes me not question one of these three tenets but presses my "The Hell You Say!" Button, I'm shocked. You know what "The Hell You Say!" Button is... The Maury Show is nominated for an Emmy. The hell you say! They're recalling NyQuil for too much alcohol. The hell you say! They're making a remake of Dirty Dancing. The hell--See? I threw you a curve ball on that one. That's the "No, the Hell They Didn't!" Button. Subtle difference but different all the same... But you get my point, right?

Well, this weekend, an author pushed my "The Hell You Say!" Button. While cruising the free books on Amazon (hubby has placed me on a "No Book" moratorium for a few days) I came across a book entitled A Hint of Frost by Hailey Edwards. I enjoy reading new authors and Ms. Edwards is new for me. And when I read the blurb it sounded really interesting! I'm like, cool. Probably about gods and ice (y'know, frost) and some awesome new mythology. So I downloaded it. Aaaand about five minutes into the book I realized, this ain't about gods...the characters are based on freakin' SPIDERS!!

Honestly, I did close the book. Shut off the Kindle. But then, a short while later, I had to open it again. The writing, the heroine's voice, the author's description of this world drew me into the story like...well like a spider would lure it's dinner into its web! Now I know what you're thinking! Get a grip! It's a book! It's not like they're are pictures! But see, that's where you would be wrong. Hailey Edwards' writing is so vivid and strong that she creates images with her words! The characters don't shift into spiders but their natures are like the arachnids they represent. I couldn't put it down! I even had my husband google the different clan names to see if Ms. Edwards had really based them on the abominations that haunt my dreams...and they are. He found it totally fascinating, by the way... The author accomplished what Tolkien and E.B. White were unable to: Make me read anything having to do with spiders! I bow down to you, Ms. Edwards! Because if anyone had told me as late as last week that I would read anything regarding those eight-leg freaks I would've said--all together now!--The Hell You Say!

When the head of the Araneidae clan is found poisoned in her nest, her eldest daughter, Lourdes, becomes their clan’s new maven. If her clan is to survive, she has but one choice: she must marry before her nest is seized. All she needs is a warrior fierce enough to protect her city and safeguard her clansmen. Such a male is Rhys the Cold.

Born the youngest son of an impoverished maven, the only things Rhys has to his name are his sword and his mercenary reputation. His clan is starving, but their fondness for the flesh of fellow Araneaeans makes them unwelcome dinner guests. Torn between loyalty to his clan and fascination with his future bride, Rhys’s first taste of Lourdes threatens to melt the cold encasing his heart.

Amid the chaos of battle, Lourdes’s sister disappears and is feared captured. Lourdes and Rhys pursue their enemies into the southlands, where they discover an odd plague ravaging southern clans as it travels north, to Erania. Determined to survive, Lourdes will discover whether she’s worth her silk or if she’s spun the thread by which her clan will hang.

In hindsight, this blurb takes on a whoooole different meaning...